• When The Glass Is Half Empty

    Being an optimist stinks sometimes. No, really, it does. You see? When you’re happy and positive and the one people look for to feel better all the time (read: Me), it gets to be a heavy burden to bear, especially when you really just want to have a bad day. Right now, I just want to be grumpy. My glass is half empty. I want to stay in bed and watch trashy TV. I want there to be a pizza delivered to my house every night for a week so I don’t have to think about cooking or eating or cleaning up. Do you ever get sick of eating or…

  • {Part 2}: The Door To Christmas: Story of The Christmas Room

    For Part 1 of The Christmas Room story, start here. ******************************* Once everything was checked out, we were given the thumbs-up to go into The Christmas Room. In spite of being in that room year in and out, the magic of the room made your brain feel all oogly woogly and for a moment you couldn’t remember where you were supposed to go or sit or what you were supposed to say and YAY IT’S CHRISTMAS WE’RE FINALLY IN! If you’ve ever been lucky enough to go into The Christmas Room, you know that whether it’s April or July or the day after Christmas, you will long for wrapped gifts and…

  • {Part 1} The Door To Christmas: The Story of The Christmas Room

    The door to the jewelry store was locked as soon as the clock struck closing time on Christmas Eve. Jewelry was put away, money was counted, the employees milled around to wait for their gifts that were always handed out after closing. My sister and I were twitchy to get out of there so Christmas could start. Christmas Eve was always spent at Grannie’s. It was tradition. It was how Christmas started. After we got home from the store, my parents seemed to mill around for hours. My grandparents and Aunt and Uncle knew to wait for us, that we would be there as soon as we could. It seemed…

  • The In Between

    Right now, I’m sitting in the most wonderful place. This place may feel sad for some. It may make some angry. For others, like me, it’s incredibly peaceful and awe-inspiring. I’m sitting in a room with my Grannie, listening to labored breathing, holding feverish hands, waiting for her last breaths to be taken. I don’t want her to go. None of us do. We selfishly want to keep her here with us forever. But it’s her time. The stroke she had a few weeks ago was more than her little body could handle. Hospice is a beautiful place. Sitting in this room makes me realize, though, that there is a…

  • It was all fine and dandy…

    The morning was great. He got up, got dressed, and even brushed his teeth without my having to ask. The excitement and anxiety was getting the best of him so breakfast was a bust. He decided on some yogurt and water. That’s fine. That’s what I would choose, too. He moseyed into school, tall and confident, saying hi to everyone he passed. That’s my little social butterfly (read: class clown) who never meets a stranger, but if he does, he turns them into a friend. With a quick wave goodbye, he was off to start third grade. THIRD GRADE? Stop it! If only I could stop time. Or at least…

  • Thoughts From the 9/11 Memorial

    This post has been in the works for nearly two weeks now. In the same way J and I were left speechless when we were there, I’m left speechless looking at the images. A little back story, though. J was only 3 when the 9/11 attacks happened. She knows very little about any of it. That’s why I felt it was very important to take her to see the sacred space, one that is silent and almost still in a city of hustle and bustle. We talked a lot both days about the tragedy. When we were walking in Midtown, we tried to imagine the streets being filled with people…

  • Roses In December

    I was reminded this morning of one of my favorite quotes. God gives us memories so that we might have roses in December. ~ James Barrie ~ After Charlie died, my dear friend from college, Laura sent me a book that helped her through the loss of her first son in 1999. Laura’s story is a beautiful one that include love, loss, survival, perseverance and selflessness. The book is Roses in December by Marilyn Willett Heavilin. I wasn’t too sure about the book when I first started reading it. Marilyn had lost three sons. Her first son died at 7 weeks old. Her second son died two years later from…